Ben Franklin’s 220 Euphemism For Drunk

Pop Quiz: Which of America’s Founding Fathers created over 200 euphemistic terms for drunkeness? Here’s a hint: Which founding father was a famous partier? The answer of course is Benjamin Franklin. Yes, Franklin was a well known imbiber (and probably the first spokesperson for Sam Adam’s beer), so naturally he would be interested in creating several clever ways to indicate that someone was “contending with Pharaoh.” In 1737 Franklin published his 220 drunken euphemisms in the Pennsylvania Gazette and believe me, they are a hoot. So, head over to mental_floss to read the full list. However, if you’ve “had a Thump over the Head with Sampson’s Jawbone” and are too “overset” to read the list, check out this video crated by comedy troupe I Made America in which Keith Habersberger recites all 220 phrases. Have a good weekend, and make sure to watch out for anyone whose “Head is full of Bees.”

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Happy New Year Cocktail

It’s obviously not January 1st, so why are we celebrating a new year? Well, today’s the first anniversary of when I started this little blog. Most of my previous attempts at blogging have barely lasted a month, so I’m pretty shocked that I’m still at it one year and 657 posts later. Thank you for your support, I’ll try to make this site better next year.

So, enough about that, what’s a Happy New Year cocktail? Well, it’s a bubbly mix of brandy, port and orange juice with a champagne base. I had one last New Year’s Eve and it’s pretty nice, if you don’t mind the slightly nutty taste of port.

The Happy New Year cocktail

  • 1/4 oz Brandy
  • 3/4 oz Ruby Port
  • 3/4 oz Orange Juice
  • 4 oz Champagne

Shake the brandy, port and orange juice in a shaker half filled with ice. Strain the liquid into a champagne flute, fill with champagne and serve.

Famous Authors’ Favorite Drinks

Whether it’s Hemingway (right) and his mojitos or the Algonquin Round Table and one of the countless number of drinks they inspired, writers and alcohol have long gone hand in hand. Over at Flavorwire, Emily Temple has compiled a guide to the favorite drinks of eleven notable authors and its well worth your attention. But be warned, if you try to follow the lead of these writers, pay heed to the words of martini and whiskey sour enthusiast Dorothy Parker:

“I wish I could drink like a lady
I can take one or two at the most
Three and I’m under the table
Four and I’m under the host”

Check out the full gallery here.

How To Mix A Don Draper

Sadly, Mad Men isn’t coming back to us until next winter. But in the meantime, why not make a Don Draper Cocktail? Artist Ho-Mui Wong created this handy visual recipe for a cocktail based on the Mad Men anti-hero. It’s pretty similar to a classic Old Fashioned recipe, but with a few additional ingredients like “advertising genius” and “unsavory women.” Make sure you have plenty of “shameful secret past” on hand before you mix it. Thanks to the Fader for this piece.

Christopher Lee, “Name Your Poison”

Christopher Lee: Actor, Knight of the Realm, author, World War II vet; in short an all around badass. Oh, and did we mention he’s a pretty good singer also? Yes, he also sings. In fact, it was only last year that Lee released a symphonic metal album about his ancestor Charlemagne.

In 1983, Lee played the villainous Mr. Midnight in the Australian musical superhero comedy The Return of Captain Invincible. The film features songs by Richard O’Brien and Richard Hartley, the same guys responsible for Rocky Horror. The film’s best number is entitled “Name Your Poison” in which Lee’s white supremacist villain tempts recovering alcoholic hero Captain Invincible (played by Alan Arkin) with a really well stocked bar. I kind of love that the lyrics reference a couple dozen cocktail names.

Graffiti Cocktail Shaker

Chicago’s Museum of Contemporary Art is selling a charming cocktail shaker designed to look like a can of spray paint. The shaker’s cap is even painted with an arrow like the top of an actual spray can. However, the best part of this shaker is that the removable label features instructions on how to make different cocktails. At the moment, the shaker is sold out, but it should be available again soon.

Cap’n Crunch Meets Captain Morgan

DeviantART user ninjaink has created a mash-up of two of the greatest captains of advertising and branding. Yes, ninjaink has combined cereal mascot Cap’n Horation Magellan Crunch (yes, that’s his full name) with Sir Henry Morgan (The real pirate who served as inspiration for the eponymous rum).  As an added bonus, ninjaink threw in an appearance by Froot Loops mascot Toucan Sam.